Sunday, September 27, 2009

When it comes to an end....

Time passes in a blink of eye, and the Earth keep spinning and spinning without our knowledge. It cannot turn back to the time we want it to be. FACE IT, THIS IS REALITY!!! At this time we will regret what we have done and what we have not done in the pass. Reality will not change just because of us. The world is cruel, if you are not going to help yourself, no one will. Sometimes being selfish is a good thing, to be better to yourself and be cruel to the world. Isn't that right?

I'm still lying to myself that this world is like a fairytale which everything will be just fine and everything will lead to a happy ending. "And they live happily ever after. The End" does this phrase sounds familar? I was brought with a mind set that this world is a happy land where everyone stays together happily together and no bad thins will happen. But what will happen if someone just leave you, right in front of your eyes without saying a single word?

Its been awhile... I'm still trying to runaway from reality. I cannot accept the fact when some one I love dearly just leave me like that. It hurts deeply inside knowing you cant see, touch, hear or feel them anymore. I regret a lot not doing my part well when you are here and now you are gone. Its useless to do anything anymore.

I really appreciate the love that you gave me, the time we spend together, all the courage you gave me. I really miss u.

It has been more than 2 years, I haven't been attending church, I feel myself so empty and sorrow. I'm in a situation like this:

1st 1/2 Chorus
Lost in wonder
I'm lost in love,
I'm lost in praise forevermore

Many people have been asking me to go church and stuff even my non-christian friends, but I feel so awkward to go back there. I just don't feel the same anymore. If you've know me better, I was a backup worship singer for a while, then I was ask to join the PR team and later on I was part of the PR Leaders in Youth Fellowship and Service on Sunday, Youth Drama Crops Leader, First Aid Leader in my Youth Camp and recently for the Church Food Fare, I was the Event Manager for my Group.

And now? I'm just a lost soul who is floating without direction. Running away from God but when I've got any problem then only I'll think of Him. Taking Him for granted, do not appreciate what He had done for me. All these years I seriously have no courage to go back there to face him anymore. I am ashamed of myself for what I have done.

But yesterday I took up my courage to go back to church with my parents and Auntie Hun, I sat behind alone cause it was cold in front or maybe I'm just not prepare to sit in front where everyone can see me. So at 1st was worship, I tried to blend in the atmosphere, but every time I tried to sing, my tears keep flowing and I got really emotional. I cant stop crying. After worship it was Holy Communion. I went in front and kneel down to have the Holy Communion and I started crying again. I was hoping no one can see me in this situation so I hurried back to my seat.

The sermon was lead by this pastor from the West Malaysia Anglican Diocese named Rev Preb Dr. Micheal Sheard. This will be his last visit to Malaysia because he is going to retire. He preech about the differences between Worship and The Church. I recall something very meaningful he said, "What is the used of salt if the salt isnt salty anymore?" This question really strikes my mind. He said in a church everyone have to be united to serve, serve together, worship together, pray together. What he say is so true. We come as a church to serve Him and the community together.

So after service I went and shoke the Pastor's hand, and he spoke to me.

He said "Are you the one at the corner during Holy Communion?"
I said "Yes it was me"
He said "Are you okay?"
I said "Yea dont worry" (facking a smile with teary eyes and walk away)

I wanted to talk to him longer but I cannot control my emotions. I wanted to tell someone so badly that I am back in church after 2 years but I have no courage to do so. Its not a big deal to them but for me I really feel..... I really duno how to express my feeling right now. I feel happy in a way and I feel confuse and bad in another way.

The Questions are:

Am I really been forgiven?

Can I continue to serve you?

Can really I come back to you?

Will the 2nd 1/2 chorus be:
Because of Jesus' unfailing love
I am forgiven
I am restored

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

My Little Zoo at Home~!

My Pets...

People once told me my house is like a SAFARI, cuz have 4 cats, 6 dogs, once a guinea pig, and a lot of fish. They say is abnormal, but to me i love them so much it doesn't bother me for having so many pets.

My Cats

Presenting my darlings, from the left Tommy, Milo. Down left Snowy and QQCupCake

Nick Name: Tommy le Bamy, Thomas le Bamas, Tommy Too
Age: 3years plus
Eye colour: Green
Siblings: Milo (younger), Ramily (younger sister MIA)
Hobby: Ham Sup Snowy, Catch lizard and weird animals
Personality: Berpura-pura Lan Si infront of the other pets but berFatt Hao behind them
Mama pick them up from popo's house

Nick name: MiMiMaiMai, Meee, Fei Chai
Age: 3years plus
Eyes colour: Green
Siblings: Tommy (older) Ramily (younger sister MIA)
Hobby: Laze around the house
Personality: Warm and loving cat, Clumsy cat alwiz menjatuhkan barang atas lantai.. Ish

Nick Name: Hao Po Zhai (hahahs) Snow Fart
Age: 1year plus
Eyes Colour: Dark Blue
Hobby: Sleeping in weird ways (you will know later)
Personality: Good to humans and aggressive to the other cats
She was found behind my backyard, almost got killed by my dogs. She the one who frighten me in de middle of the night, I saw a white tail flying i tought she was a thief at my backyard cuz my dogs are barking, (sebenarnya takut hantu) lols....

Nick Name: Cuppie, Ugly CupCake, Cup cup cup cup cup cuppie, Ugly Fuck Face
All de name di kasi my sis. =.=
Age: 5 months old
Eyes Colour: Orange
Hobby: Catch small tiny lizards, melarikan diri apabila mahu cari dia.. Manja you if she wants some thing.
Mummy pick her at the market.

Tommy and Milo alwiz do their activities together like bird watching at the window and even sleep together.
But since kehadiran QQcupCake, she got in de way of the 2 loving brothers. She became the Little sister of them... Hahahahs
The Stuff toy is tipu one... Kekekes.... My bro's toys lai de..

CupCake in Action~!
Isn't she adorable??? So Comel... I love her a lot...

Snowy adalah Kucing yang paling Cantik dan Glam....

Tetapi mempunyai tabiat buruk dan cara tidur yang paling buruk di dunia...
She'll only sleep on Wai Kuan's bed because its as white as her and it is big... Lols... Kucing yang tahu memilih.

Our Family Cats

1. Goldie - Pass away (My family's)
2. Ginger - (Ai Ling and Xian's)
3. Tim Tam - Run away cat (Ai Ling and Xian's)
4. Ramily - Run away cat (Gong-Gong's)
5. Mother Cat (Mother of Tommy, Milo and Ramily)
6. Yoda (Ai Ling and Xian's) Kucing yang paling comel... I miss Yoda....

I havent take a picture of Jamie yet so if count like this all together we have 4 orange Cats all together. Lols

My Dogs

Starting from the Top left: Charlie, Ian, Aloysious.
Botom Left: Husky, Larry, Jack

Rover and Sandy's Heir (1st Son)
Nick Name: Char Char, Char Siew Bao, Charlie Chu...
Colour:White n brown

Rover and Sandy's Heir (2nd Son)
Nick Name:Yan Yan Little Ian
Colour: Black

There's 1 more 3rd Daughter, Angel died when the cocount hit on her head.

Rover and Sandy's Heir (Youngest Son)
Nick Name: Loy Loy. Ah loy.
Colour: Light brown

Breed: Siberian Husky
Eyes Colour: Blue and brown (both different colour)
Nick Name: Fei Po, Dai Gau Sui, Princess, Kiki

Breed: Toy Poodle
Fur Colour: Was dark brown at 1st now became light brown d.
Nick name: Sai Kau Sui, Lalilulelo, Larry the Berry.


Breed: Doberman
Fur colour: Brown
Nick Name: Ultra Jack, Jack Jack.

Husky was like so small when we brought her back. now she is completly OVERWIGHT!!!!

Larry, so call mama's second son. Lolz... Friendly dog but some times very chikopek. He has moodswing some times. Other than that he's okie. hahahs.

Last but not least not forgetting my beloved guinea pig Lanny.

Although it had died when I am away to training, I will not forget my beloved pet.
He was with me during my depression, he was the one who keep me company and occupied by feeding it and cleaning its house all the time. It will only squeak to me only.

R.I.P my dear Friend

Lanny and Friends

Tom Tom @ Fred's guinea pig was Lanny's only guinea pig friend.
Till now I still duno either Lanny or Tom Tom are male or Female.
Other than that, Lanny still have big kor kor Tommy and Milo to play with. It doesnt eat it. Thats the wierd part. Hahahas

Really last one... Hahahahs

This is 18SX

Are you under age?????

Are you sure u wanna see????


So Ham Sup ga u????


Okie la....

Presenting the Finale:

3P of them.... =.= Horrible.....
Tommy u kena spay la u CMI la.... Dun go "sit on" Snowy la....
Larry U sat pai lo... Every time see Suki you also CMI de... Sat Pai la u Larry...

Lolz end of my Pets story....
Sekian Terima Kasih...

Sunday, September 13, 2009

SS501- In A Rush

This is a simple song but i was hooked on it for so long... Lolz... Like so lam like that...

Here are the lyrics, come sing with me^^

1 - It came over me in a rush
When I realized that I love you so much
That sometimes I cry, but I cant tell you why
Why I feel what I feel inside

How I try to express whats been juggling my mind
But still cant find the words
But I know that somethings got a hold of me

Repeat 1

Baby, some day Ill find a way to say
Just what you mean to me
But if that day never comes along
And you don't hear this song
I guess you'll never know that...

Repeat 1

And when I say inside, I mean deep
You fill my soul with something I cannot explain
Whats over me

Repeat 1 til end


Sunday, September 6, 2009

Bye Bye Ipoh,

BB my beloved Family,

Bb my frens

Bb my facebook

I'll work hard during exams.... Thx to all of u who wish me best of luck... See you all in a few days more... Lolz...

Sekian Terima Kasih.

Friday, September 4, 2009

At last, sudah finish download... Kekeks... Enjoy~!

G-Dragon 1st Official Solo Album

The Transformation of my G-Dragon

Nick Name:G-Dragon
Real Name
: Kwon Ji Yong

: Team Leader/Rapper/Vocal
: August 18, 1988
(lolz same age, 1day after de duck) Hobbies: Drawing, Listening to music, writing music/poetry Specialties: Dancing, Rap, BeatBox, Song Writing, Singing, English, Chinese

This was my lover boy who alwiz got dump by girls. He's like the sweetest guy ever, including my Kim Ki Bum... ahahahah. These was his old picture... So comel >.< Amir will say i mengila again... Hahahahs...


On 18.8.2009 A.K.A his birthday he released his 1st Solo Album [Heartbreaker]. The song was like so nice. I'm trying to download it but belum habis download... Later I'll upload the video ba... His new fashion reminds me of Death Note's Raito+Mellow with the apple... So bergaya sial... Love the new hair.... Now ppl big boy lerr... Not the lover boy that let people breaks his heart any more...

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Dear SS501's Fans,

There will be a autograph session from the band on the 3 of September 2009, which is SOON.

Omg now nie we know... Aduh stress nya wanna go la... Y la tell so late... Depress-nya...

Here's the infomation:

Date : 3 September 2009
Time : 6:00pm
Venue : One World Hotel ,Bandar Utama,Petaling Jaya
Jasmine & Orchid Room,Level C

Was debating whether to go anot,

1. Will be able to see:

  • Kim Hyun Joong (LEADER @ Ji Hoo in BOF)

  • Kim Hyung Joon (MY BABY@ PALING COMEL)


  • Kim Kyu Joong (THE HOT GUY)


2. Will face the band less than 1 meter in the autograph session, think about it, this close to them... Omg.... Dillema..........
3. Face to face and can tell them SARANG HEYO OPPA~!
4. Can shake their hand. (KYAA.... My darlings)
5. Buy their CD and get autograph.
6. Very less opportunity they would be coming already.

1. Debating either to take bus or drive. (berry ma fan)
2. Jie have to work.
3. I've got exam soon.
4. Need to study.
5. The place would be crowded.
6. Now H1N1 also sked ga....

Hmmm... So how leh??? Babe... U how? I very exicted la... This kasi u la... Let u be more happy la... This pic looks so cute both of them hahaz.

Dedicated to u babe,
Your Kim Kim Bum and My Kim Ki Bum

Still thinking to go or not to go.

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